SUICIDE BUMMERS

Islam has suicidal tendencies. The Bali bombers strike again, suicide bombers doing it all for the love of God. October must be the suicide season, fresh fertilizer for fallow fields. Flowers grow where tourists fell, the death knell for picnics and frolics and Muslims on the beach. This is unholy war. This is suicide. This is apocalypse. Muslims grab the torch of negativity from the communists and run with it. If neutral countries convert to Islam, then they’re on to something. The world could use a new Messiah, but I don’t think Osama’s it. He might be wearing robes, but I don’t think the Messiah will be demonstrating proper use of a machine gun. I think he’ll be speaking seven or eight languages fluently, preferably Chinese, Russian, Turkish, Arabic, Persian, Swahili, French, Spanish, and, uh, oh yeah, English. That’s nine, a lucky number in China. I think the Bible or somebody predicted there’d by ten divisions of the world by about this time in history, so let’s add Malay/Indonesian, representing three countries and a quarter bil people directly, the entire Polynesian world by extension. Muslims should be happy to have four on the list, maybe five counting Swahili, so Africa’s got two with Arabic. Asia’s got a few, Europe’s got four, so everybody’s represented linguistically except American Indians. Maybe we should add Quechua, the language of some ten million dirt-poor Native Americans in the Andes Mountains of South America.

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