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  hardie karges 4:34 am on August 18, 2024 Permalink | Reply
  Tags: ahimsa ( 7 ), Buddhism ( 431 ), CHRISTIANITY ( 161 ), conciliation, Hardie Karges ( 242 ), homo sapiens ( 7 ), meditation ( 192 ), Rumi, social media ( 13 ), Sufi   

  Buddhism in the Balance: Conciliation, not Confrontation… 

  

  Conciliation seems to be a prime corollary of Buddhism, something like Christian forgiveness, but without all the weeping and wailing. And I’m not trying to be cute, but seriously, let it go, ‘it’ being that reactive stance to any blow to ego, whether full frontal or slight glance, equal in their danger to provoke chain reactions and nonstop confrontation, which should be the last thing that anybody would really want, and the first thing to avoid. In other words, don’t take the bait.

  Now, I don’t know if we’re just an argumentative species, or it’s a western thing, but the upshot of the modern Social Media (SM?) phase of world history seems to be that we’re a bunch of combative SOB’s. And, while Buddhism and the other Dharma religions are well-known for advocating the non-violence of ahimsa, I’m not sure but that maybe some damage might already be done by that time. So, I think the great Sufi poet Rumi had a much higher and better standard (yes, Buddhists often copy this):

  Before you speak, let your words pass through three gates: At the first gate, ask yourself, ‘Is it true?’ At the second gate ask, ‘Is it necessary?’ At the third gate ask, ‘Is it kind?’

  In other words, be better than the other one, the instigator, the troublemaker. Don’t respond in kind. You don’t have to respond at all. In many instances, that’s the best you can do, and there’s really nothing better than that. But it’s not always easy. And what if they’re standing right there and won’t let you just walk away? And wouldn’t you like to teach the instigator something about the results of his bad speech? Humor is another possibility but be careful. The laughter often works. Regardless, reconcile ASAP. Don’t hold grudges, or they will hold you.

   

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  hardie karges 5:27 am on February 11, 2024 Permalink | Reply
  Tags: bonobos, Buddhism ( 431 ), conciliation, determinism ( 4 ), DNA ( 44 ), Hardie Karges ( 242 ), homo sapiens ( 7 ), meditation ( 192 )   

  Buddhism 499: Conciliation is always better than confrontation…  

  

  There is always an alternative to war and conflict. Conciliation starts at home. Such is the way of the world. If we can’t maintain the peace within our families, then how can we ever hope to keep the peace among such large, scattered and diverse groups as exist in the world these days, with eight billion souls and counting? Score one for samsara, the world in all its gory details: hate, greed, fear, and anger, watch your step and be on a constant lookout for danger.  

  But it doesn’t have to be that way. Except for chimpanzees—but not bonobos—no other species besides glorious homo sapiens feels the need to kill for any other reason than to acquire food. We do it because we’re wired that way, I guess, DNA and all that rap, A, C, G, T nucleotides, with sometimes Y and W (just kidding), as if all our thoughts and emotions were pre-programmed at the factory, just like the determinists claim, and all our actions doomed to repetition and suffering.  

  Enter religion, and now we have reason and inspiration to up our game. For now, we have expanded our family to include all like-minded souls, regardless of race, gender, or geography, the only problem being, of course, that that is still not enough. For one thing, different religions don’t always agree with their own governments, much less with each other. Still there is hope, and the rule of thumb to ‘leave well enough alone’ is not a bad guide for the guileless. Sometimes you don’t have to do anything. You have to do nothing—quickly. And like so, determination can defeat determinism, and peace can prevail.
   
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  hardie karges 4:34 am on September 1, 2023 Permalink | Reply
  Tags: Bentham, Buddhism ( 431 ), CHRISTIANITY ( 161 ), conciliation, Hardie Karges ( 242 ), Middle Path ( 55 ), Mills, pragmatism, religion ( 158 ), skillfuil means   

  The Skillful Means of Buddhism  

  

  Buddhism wants you to accept and adapt to your circumstances. Christianity wants you to change them. Let’s split the difference and call it good, an ever-evolving Middle Path, in which we are neither totally renunciative nor totally aggressive, but rather capable of both, or either, depending on what the situation calls for. But that doesn’t mean that the ethics or morals change with the situation, only that the path forward can, or might, change in such a way as to benefit the greatest number. 

  Because pragmatic concerns always weigh heavily in the considerations of possible paths forward, i.e. the greatest good for the greatest number. Bentham and Mills didn’t invent such concepts in 19^th century Britain. They only systematized them for intellectual consideration. But the Buddha was way ahead of them with his use of ‘skillful means’ to settle disputes and move arguments forward. It’s very simple: you lean toward the best possibility for conciliation, while de-emphasizing potential conflicts. Points of contention can be worked out later, if indeed they still exist.  

  Still the path is there for traveling, even if it revolves around a familiar center. Nothing stands still, not in this universe of constant motion. Silence doesn’t always imply stillness. That is a luxury. Thus, we can both adapt to our circumstances AND change them, and without confrontation when we use skillful means to ease the path forward. Confrontation is to be avoided at all costs while conciliation is to be encouraged. That is the gospel—of Buddhism, and nothing is more important.